sure about exactly what they mean don’t sweat it, we’ve got your back. There was a time when we didn’t understand their significance either. We’ve learned and we'll share. 
Consider this an open invitation to visit our 
About Us
The Dirty Shirt contributors got together and had a meeting about the About-Us page. Through the haze of an alcohol buzz it was decided that we’d toss in a little bio information and represent each person through the use of anthropomorphic fruit and vegetables.
Before the final decision was made one of the Dirty Shirt crew grabbed a potato chip from a bowl and commented on the eerie resemblance the chip had to our 37th president, Richard Milhous Nixon…
That was all it took. We called for an immediate vote and it was unanimous that fruit and vegetables would do better job of representing each person than potato chips ever could – chips just send the wrong message.
Jeff – He’s the guy with the largest tool collection in the bunch so he wins some kind of prize by default. Broccoli is not on his favorites-list and this nutritious and colorful vegetable has been intentionally omitted from his portrait. The brutha’s got a background in computer systems management and he believes that everything will eventually break and will need to be fixed. It’s probably why he’s got the biggest tool collection – everything actually does break and need to be fixed. When he’s not fixing broken computer systems he’s fixing broken household items, cars and boats to relax and unwind a bit.
Jeff is a part-time astronaut scheduled to fly in 2027. Here he expresses his thoughts when he learns that he can’t take his Dirty Shirt tool box along on the trip:
Michelle – This sista’s got a thing for decorating. If it looks great and works fine that’s reason enough to change it. She’s an almost-vegetarian and voted for the fruit and vegetable portraits with great enthusiasm. She can see things in a room that others can’t see – speaking from a decorum point of view. Give her ten minutes and she’ll paint a picture of how the room should be rather than how it is. That’s pretty handy; just like a hanky and pocket knife, it’s stuff a girl can use. She’s also pretty good with a tool in her hand but we’d vote her as most likely to redecorate a room when she’s bored. You’ve never seen a person so happy than with a deck of paint swatches in her hand. She’s a manager in government and spends her professional time trying to make sense of that conundrum.
Michelle needs a calendar that sorts out the holidays and other special times of the year:
Sean – He’s the only one in the group that can quote Shakespeare. That has absolutely no value when you’re engaged in DIY work but it’s good to know in case you need it. He’s a relatively new home owner and at times has that “Oh crap, what are we into here” look on his face. He’s a pretty big dude and that’s handy when you need somebody to juggle 50lb bags of cement or manhandle a jack-hammer. Ketchup is his favorite food – if some ketchup is good then more of it is better when it comes to this universally loved condiment. Sean is an administrative educator and spends his time rationing food, water and #2 pencils to the inmates.
Sean observes that there is no substitute for cubic-inches:
Lindsay – She’s another educator who focuses more of her time on teaching musical instrumentation than worrying about Shakespeare. She’s got a serious case of “if it ain’t broke let’s fix it anyway” mentality. Whatever it is that you’re fixing or building you’re probably not doing it fast enough. We keep her away from the coffee machine since this legal stimulant tends to exacerbate the problem. But every project needs a project-manager and she’d get our vote for most likely to succeed in building an addition onto the side of a house – in record time.
Lindsay's quality-statement is provided here:
Evan – He’d be voted most likely to track down and capture dinner. A carnivore of the truest sense, finding birdshot in a grilled bird-breast is just a part of the fun. Educated in marketing but he’s more into law-enforcement these days, he’s got the touch when it comes to turning a wrench. That’s probably due to his “I don’t get overly upset about anything” personality. When you’re standing at the threshold of hell in your DIY project he’s a good guy to have around. It just seems so no-big-deal when you’re busting knuckles with him on a project.
Jourdan – She’s another one of our educators and she’s also our pop-culture girl. By her own admission she’s a “clicker” and she’s every website owner’s dream visitor. She’ll click on every link she can find on a web page. She takes that knowledge and translates it into a “what’s hip today” kind of sensibility when it comes to DIY work.
She’s got a car that she doesn’t really like and talks smack about it when it’s out of earshot. When she parks it for the night she pats it on the dashboard and says “good car” if it didn’t break down that day. Who are we to say that a dose of encouragement doesn’t actually make it run better?
Jourdan offers up some over-the-counter medical advice that can be used by every DIYer:
Emily – She’s only been on the planet for about two years and doesn’t know a thing about DIY work. She’s just happy putting her dolls in her little wagon and towing them around the house. Small things that we take for granted are absolutely fascinating to her and she points these things out to us all of the time. She’ll spot a little crumb on the floor, approached it, stand over it, pick it up and present it to the homeowner. That’s how a two-year-old suggests that your house could use a little scrubbing without ever saying a word.
Emily's thoughts on property-standards within our neighborhood:
